Reasons Why English is One of the Hardest Languages.
Just try to read some of these sentences without getting confused
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
22) There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
23) English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France .
24) Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.
25) Quicksand works slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
26) And why is it that writers write, but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham?
27) Why do we drive on the Parkway and park on the driveway? 28) If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn’t the plural of booth beeth?
29) One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese?
30) Doesn’t it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
31) If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? Is it an odd, or an end?
32) If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught?
33) If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
34) In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
35) Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?
36) We have noses that run and feet that smell?
37) How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
38) You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, you fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm goes off by going on.
39) English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
40) Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
41) OK, so what’s the speed of dark?
42) Why do psychics have to ask for your name?
43) If a cow laughs hard, does milk come out its nose?
44) If the #2 pencil is so popular why is it still #2?
45) If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing in the store is free yet?
46) Is it possible for someone to become addicted to therapy? And If so, how would you treat them?
47) If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
48) Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
49) When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
50) Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
51) Why is the word abbreviation so long?
52) If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, is it misspelled?
53) And if it is misspelled, how would we know?
54) Why does “fat chance” and “slim chance” mean the same thing?
55) Why are they called “stands” when they are made for sitting?
56) Doesn’t “expecting the unexpected” make the unexpected expected?
57) Why are a “wise man” and a “wise guy” opposites?
58) Why do “overlook” and “oversee” mean opposite things?
59) If you are dialing from a touch-tone phone, Why do you call it ‘dialing’?
60) Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?
61) If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?
62) Are children who act in rated ‘R’ movies allowed to see them?
63) “Cute as a button” Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?
64) Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”?
65) Isn’t Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
66) If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
67) Can you get cornered in a round room?
68) Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?
69) Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
70) Wouldn’t it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?
71) Isn’t it funny how the word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’?
72) Why is it that when things get wet they get darker, even though water is clear?
73) If a fork were made of gold would it still be considered silverware?
74) Why is there that little space inside strawberries, as if it was meant for a pit, and then the seeds are on the outside?
75) Why do you go “back and forth” to town if you really must go forth before you go back?
76) Why do companies offer you “free gifts?” Since when has a gift NOT been free?
77) If something “goes without saying,” why do people still say it?
78) You know the expression, “Don’t quit your day job?” Well what do you say to people that work nights?
79) If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
80) Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
81) How is it possible to have a civil war?
82) If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
83) Whose cruel idea was it for the word “Lisp” to have a “S” in it?
84) Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
85) If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times, does he become disoriented?
86) Why on Earth, with over 3/4 of our planet covered by water, don’t we call it ‘ocean’?
87) Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?
88) Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
89) If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
90) If quitters never win, and winners never quit, how can it be wise to: “Quit while you’re ahead”?
91) Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
92) What hair color do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men?
93) Most mothers feed their babies with little spoons and forks. What do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
94) Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to these people? Why don’t they put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while delivering the mail?
95) Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn’t zigzag?
96) After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
97) If it’s zero degrees outside today and it’s supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
98) What’s another word for Thesaurus?
99) If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
100) How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
101) If two wrongs don’t make a right, then how come two negatives make a positive?
