Pressured by Time and The Lack of It!

I am anxious today; my creative ability has been sidelined due to my everyday job that puts food on the table. I write best in the mornings. I do everything best in the mornings really. Afternoons are reflective and definitely downtime, evenings are cosy and meditative. So now I feel pressured to produce something creative with the sun having disappeared from view.

I decided to bother my local newspaper yesterday and ask if they wanted freelance writers, I knew it was a long shot but I took it anyway. They don’t need freelancers but I got constructive criticism (I think it was sarcastic really) but I’m trying to be upbeat here. The editor quite haughtily finished with a flourish that when I had a good idea to go back to him, so I did. One hour later I amended my initial story and emailed it straight back to him. I will keep you updated on that………..

Let’s be philosophical here – I am a writer, see I’ve convinced myself in 5 days now, self delusions are always the best form of madness I find. So being a writer I have to face rejection and face it again and again and again…..but there will be triumph at the end I am sure of that.

When I was a child I always wanted to be remembered for something, I didn’t want to die and be forgotten, I wanted to leave a legacy to the world. I then discovered the writings of Oscar Wilde and was amazed at his presence and wit that was still salient in today’s world. I want to achieve work on that sort of scale – but I don’t want to go to gaol to do it!

The evening draws on now and it’s time for reflection and ultimately sleep…..dreaming of a bestseller in the Top 100 with my name on it. Don’ tell me you don’t believe in the power of positive thoughts!