Five Ways to Sound Real Damn Clever

As a professional writing major, it is more or less my job to sound like a pretentious smartass. However, in the interest of fairness, I would like to share with you some very effective tools when writing an argument. Wonderfully enough, these also work just as effectively if spoken at just the right time, so take these to heart and use them wisely.

Paradox

As we know, a paradox is a set of elements that seem (and probably are) directly contradictory. Using opposing terms in one sentence effectively can create a sense of truth.

By that I mean the notion is so abstract, that on some level you understand exactly what the person is trying to say.

“Art is a form of lying in order to tell the truth.” -Pablo Picasso

Aphorism

These are very short and witty statements. When delivered at the end of an argument at the right time, an audience can be won over in entirety. They are typically a declaration of a personal truth.

“A penny saved is a penny earned”-Benjamin Franklin

“An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.” -H.L. Mencken

Antaclasis

This device requires a quick mind to use. It is when one uses the same word in two different senses. That is to say, you’re using the same word in one sentence, but in a different way each time.

“Your argument is sound, nothing but sound.”-Benjamin Franklin

“If you aren’t fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm.” -Vince Lombardi

Chiasmus

This is the repetition of a word or phrase, then repeating it again in the same sentence, but in reverse. Both halves of the sentence contribute to a valid whole.

“One should eat to live, not live to eat.”- Jean Baptiste Poquelin Moliere

“Your manuscript is both good and original; but the part that is good is not original, and the part that is original is not good.”–Samuel Johnson

Antithesis

This is the clever placing of contrasting ideas in parallel structure. The contrast is often in the words themselves, but is also just as effective if the contrast is in the ideas those words embody.

“What if I am rich, and another is poor-strong, and he his weak-intelligent, and he is benighted-elevated, and he is depraved?”-William Lloyd Garrison

“We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.”–Martin Luther King, Jr.

So there you have it. Five ways to sounds pretty damn clever in front of friends, family and tutorial groups. Enjoy.