A Writer Must Decide Whether Family and Friends Are Off Limits
Who is your audience?
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“All right, Mr. Hogan. Let’s get to it. Have you ever used family or friends in your flash fiction?”
“Of course. I’m a realistic writer. I get my ideas from life. I make a lot of things up but I also transcribe directly from life.”
“Have any of your stories ever hurt any of your family or friends?”
“I know the stories have made them uncomfortable. Here’s the problem. If a writer writes about life, I don’t mean fantasy, I mean about real people doing all the things that real people do then that writer is going to write about not only the good but also the bad. The people the writer knows best are family and friends. Do you know how many good books would never have been written if the writer had made family and friends off limits? Sure, you disguise your characters; but if you’re any good the family and friends will know you’re writing about them.”
“You could actually hurt people. Good people.”
“Good people do bad things, too. They also do good things. You write about the good and the bad.”
“That seems a harsh philosophy.”
“What do you think of Hemingway or F. Scott Fitzgerald or John O’Hara or Gertrude Stein?”
“All great writers”
“You would’ve never heard of any of them if they hadn’t used family and friends in their fiction. They were writing for an audience beyond their family and friends.”
“So, what advice would you give to new and aspiring writers about using family and friends in their flash fiction, short stories and novels?”
“If that writer is writing for the widest audience possible, use anybody you have to to get the story. That includes yourself. It most definitely includes yourself. You know yourself better than anyone else. If you’re concerned about hurting the feelings of your family and friends then just write for them.”
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May 31st, 2010 at 9:29 am
Having survived a visit from the grandkids this week, this title caught my eye. My family is pretty secure, and have lived with my writing all their lives. I think the only topic that got me in real hot water was writing a song about an eraser in the ear. My oldest son was very happy that my only copy of that disappeared somewhere in the dust of moving. I’m most likely to write things based on my daughter and myself; since she also writes, we know how this works. There are one or two poems I deemed too personal to publish after I wrote them.
December 21st, 2011 at 1:25 am
Good advice.