StumbleUpon and Triond Friends
StumbleUpon and Triond can work, they are valuable, social tools. Abusing the system or overloading others is not a sensible idea.
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I realise this will lose me a few StumbleUpon and Triond friends but my true ones will know where I am coming from.
StumbleUpon
I joined StumbleUpon to find quality sites to learn from, to enjoy and to share with others.
My Triond friends had joined and we enjoyed the occasional banter on the tool bar, we shared quality work and if we felt it worthy and knew our non Triond friends would appreciate it, we uploaded and Stumbled some of their pieces from Triond. We discovered each other and reviewed them.
Just recently it has become a chore. Why? Because everyday I am bombarded by Trionders sending me their work and that of others, it is coming at me from all angles, some days it is in triplicate! I had no Internet connection for a few days and came back on-line to 172 Stumbles, 90% were duplicated from the same crowd…all Triond items. I thumbed up those I enjoyed, it was a useful way of catching up.
Some Triond users are using fake identities by setting up a second account on StumbleUpon, they are then Stumbling theirs twice so it means sometimes the same item falls into my in-box many times and in all honesty some of it is not worth reading. Some Trionders have stopped using Triond to write and are sending their past works via StumbleUpon, some are sending it and asking me to Digg it and Reddit it etc; still via the Stumble browser. So I have this to say…
I have a NEWSFEED on TRIOND and choose what I upload from there, by sending me your work via StumbleUpon will not mean I will automatically give it a thumbs up.
I object to the private messages asking why I have not done so, this is an abuse of my right to choose, your greed to be noticed and earn money is not my concern!
I rarely ask to have my personal work Stumbled but have noted that on the rare occasion that I have, the Stumbling Me-Me-Me’s have ignored it.
You finding me is called becoming a FAN.
Me finding you is called becoming a FAN
I do not want message after message asking me why I have not befriended you just because you have read my work, I would have looked at your work and chosen to not read any further, I DID NOT ENJOY IT, sorry but that is fact…my right to choose.
Finding each other is called becoming FRIENDS
I will comment if I enjoyed your particular piece found on the newsfeed, I will Stumble and Digg it if I feel I want to share it, this is my right to do so, do not risk our friendship by bashing at my door. My friends, I have discovered and uploaded many articles and poems, but I do it my way.
DO NOT abuse my friendship by overloading my inbox with:
Hi I Stumbled your Triond articles today but you have not done mine, I did 5 of yours. I checked your Stumble blog and you did not do mine…yawn…
OR
Hi how are you?
Here is my work for the last month
link
link
link
link…get the picture?
Send me your stuff and I will read it…HOW LAZY ARE YOU? If you truly are interested then you would have made the effort!
Today I blocked a ‘friend’ from entering my in box and removed them from my list. Abusive friends I do not need, I have enough respectful ones, Thank You. (Although I have probably scared them off now!)
DO NOT write long poems in my comment boxes, you have a profile page of your own to do that, upload it and work at it like we all do please. ( Certain exceptions… banter poetry is the exception, although RJ Evans is pushing his luck ;0 ).
Triond is struggling with outside SPAMMERS, please do not become internal ones.
So there you have it. I have made a descision to change my angle here on Triond and my Stumbling activities are going to change with it. If you don’t like my decision…delete me from Triond and StumbleUpon it is your right to choose.
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May 10th, 2009 at 8:53 am
+1. You are so right!
May 10th, 2009 at 9:15 am
I feel for you Glynis. I sometimes feel that way myself though I have limited my SU friends to just a few. It would be a shame if you have been driven away. You have always been a good friend to me. I hope I will still see you around sometimes.
Your friend
Christine
May 10th, 2009 at 9:26 am
**STANDING OVATION**
May 10th, 2009 at 9:39 am
Thank you, Glynis! I could not agree with you more! Thank you, thank you and thank you!
May 10th, 2009 at 9:43 am
Yes, I agree totally. It is obvious who is desperate for reads by the number of times they send the same article if they are ignored. It makes makes me angry. Worst of all are the those who tell lies: I have read your articles, read mine, Stumble mine and I will reciprocate (I’ve fallen for that before and I’m still waiting) and even ‘Stumbling for friend’ (oh, do you mean Stumbling for your other identity?)
Yes, Glynis, well done! And if it stops RJ’s poetry you will have done something amazing! LOL Sorry RJ!!!
May 10th, 2009 at 9:43 am
I recognise a lot of my own dissatisfaction with Trionders and their SU habits here. Although I welcome ‘friends’ on SU, I have recently made a habit of declining requests if people have not bothered to introduce themselves via the email system on SU (it says it quite clearly on my Triond profile, together with my SU name but people do not read it).
Now, with SU one things we have to do is accept that, once we make ‘friends’ then that friend is able to send pages to you. I personally try and limit it to one or two a day and, as I write mostly on the weekends, that is when my SU friends get it in their box. – and possibly cuss me (only a little I hope) However, I have sometimes had 10 or 20 from the same stumbler, often with requests that I thumb up or review the work. That sort of activity I did not sign up for (I personally never ask people that they thumb up my stuff – it’s up to them!).
However, there is the expectation from certain people that if they send you something that you *must* stumble it and thumb it up – or even worse, review it. This is where I really agree with Glynis. No, no, no, no, no! As a SU friend I will receive your mail but am under no obligation to stumble that work, however many times the ‘friend; has stumbled my own.
My SU profile/blog represents my own interests and if an article does not interest me then it will not be stumbled – as then it would appear in my SU blog and to the rest of the community there it would seem as if I like it. In fact, I have recently begun to thumb things down that ‘friends’ have sent me because if they have taken any interest in me then they will know that what they have sent is of zero interest to me. I reckoned that was a little mean and have since stopped it (the thumbing down) but the sheer weight of traffic rendered me a little less patient than I should have been. However, to actually review something on SU, that is another thing. I have to *really* like it.
What also happens is that Triond users think that SU is an extention of Triond, which it is not. It is a huge community that is much older and dwarfs Triond and they are much cleverer than Trionders too. For example, many Trionders have been blocked from SU for stumbling ONLY their own andother Trionders work. People have not taken the time to stumble anything else – this usually shows up in the amount of pages they have stumbled as a figure and the percentage of those that are from sites such as Cookfuck and Socytothem.
Another problem for Trionders and this is something I supsect that not many are aware of is the math that is used by SU. Their algorithms can identify when groups of people stumble the same site’s pages over and over and are created so that these pages find it much harder then to make it in to the wider SU community. Trionders with only Triond friends on SU will find that the law of diminshing returns will soon apply. The fact that some Trionders have not discovered non Trionders to befriend there soon shows up on their SU blog and enables the accusative finger of SPAMMER to be pointed towards them. SO, when a new Trionder stumbles their article and gets 100 hits they should not be surprised if the next only gets 50. One of the best things to do is NOT to stumble everything.
That aside, to send your articles to your SU friends – those who have agreed to befriend you – is not spamming – it is part of the agreement that two people make on SU. This of course is a relationship that *can* be abused – as in the amount of requests to stumble that Glynis recently received.
OK rabbit over. Sorry about the length of this reply, Glynis. It was thought provoking to say the least.
Oh – and no more of my ‘poetic’ homages either – I promise!
May 10th, 2009 at 9:48 am
Well said!
May 10th, 2009 at 9:54 am
I’m also feeling fed-up with some Trionders, who keep on flooding my Triond’s mail box with lots of their links asking me to read and comment theirs, but they haven’t even read mine. I think they’ve abused the friendship here. This is not HEALTHY at Triond. Because of those irresponsible Trionders, the article submitted to StumbleUpon not longer work as in previously. This is a SAD thing. I feel like that ost of them are being here for PERSONAL GAINS rather than for maintaning friendship and to share ideas.
May 10th, 2009 at 10:12 am
Thank you all. I agree with you Chan, Louie and RJ.
May 10th, 2009 at 10:29 am
Glynis,
I am so glad you wrote this! It should be an arrow to ignorance heads! I even received in my personal email address to stumble, and have asked to be removed many times! There are people who would stumble their own breath if they could…
As for Trionders, my inbox is full of “I have been away, sorry…but here are my new published stuffs…link..link..link..link..” As of now, my finger loves the “BLOCK” button!
You go my lady!
May 10th, 2009 at 10:32 am
Glynis, my dear dear friend, I fully agree with you. I do not use SU any longer for this reason. It is hard enough to keep up with true friends and read all their work. If after a while you do not read my material then you are gone as a friend. I don’t have time to play around and help folks that don’t help me. I have found a great way to network my stories on Yahoo Questions and Answers, it is working for me. I only want my friends to check me out for the support of their friendship. I have removed quite a few so called friends as of late. Take care of yourself, Happy Mother’s Day and let me know how the wedding turns out.
Your friend, Pam
May 10th, 2009 at 11:00 am
I have had the problem with DIGG, so many people have submitted/spammed their triond sites that now 3 triond sites (picable, scienceray and a computer thing) are banned.
I signed up for Triond to make money, but am enslaved to friends requests (not yours) its frustrating.
May 10th, 2009 at 11:15 am
Thanks Glynis! Bravo! This is well said.
May 10th, 2009 at 11:16 am
100% agree!
I have dial up it takes ages for things to load, as such I am way behind on things sent to me via Stumble.
(you might have made an error here – using FANS for both types of people on TRIOND)
um.. oh yes..
people are getting themselves banned from Stumble by only submitting and stumbling and spamming their own links- hopefully they will not be so problematic as to get every Triond site (or user) banned.
May 10th, 2009 at 11:24 am
Knew that Computersight was banned by Digg – has been for over a year but didn’t realise about Scienceray and Picable…
May 10th, 2009 at 11:37 am
WOW! I had no idea! I’m in Triond to try to improve my writing and to be able to read fresh work. Rarely do I use SU and had no idea such abuses were occurring.
As it is, I’m over-loaded with leaving remarks on Triond and am re-thinking the whole process.
Thanks for the article, hope it hits home!
Clay
May 10th, 2009 at 11:53 am
Hi Glynis!
Excellent…excellent…excellent!!! To H__LL with those who would be offended at what you have written here! They’re the ones who NEED to be offended! (And some are so thick-headed that they wouldn’t recognize themselves if looking into a mirror, anyways!)!
I am amazed more often than I should be at how ignorant and rude people can be…to bombard another writer with “please…please…do me…I’m here at the head of the line…shove, push, elbow-in-gut…over here, see me?!…
What is with these writers, anyway? I hate people who become “friends” just to use another person’s contacts or good name or anything else. Friends are supposed to be just that…friends! And writers should be honing their craft…not begging, whining, and rudely bossing other writers to advertise for them!
If the writing is good, the readers will follow and multiply. If the writing sucks, all the bombardments in the world isn’t going to help these articles to succeed!
And while we’re on the subject of stupid and sucky material, what’s with all the pictures that some writers post where it’s the same animal, plant, person, or object but just taken from five different angles…and posted with five different captions, too!?!
The only thing that these writers succeed at is to create a reputation of “I’m too lazy to put much effort into my pics but I want the clicks”!
Until I see something INTERESTING, I’m not checking these sites anymore!
May 10th, 2009 at 2:01 pm
Good work. I must admit when I started with Triond about 2 years ago, I knew very little of the online writing world and what exactly spamming was. I confess I did leave some links, but I only did so thinking that others would truly want to read my work. I didn’t realize that in doing so, it’s like buying a birthday present for a friend and then telling them now you have to buy one for me as well and this is exactly what I want. But, I didn’t do it out of anything except a lack of knowledge and understanding of the online writing world. I learned quickly because of feedback. Now, if someone emails me a link, I may or may not look at it. I guess I sort of look at it like commercials on TV. Sometimes you enjoy the commercials, sometimes you don’t really pay attention to them. I appreciate your honesty.*
Blessings.
Sincerely,
-Liane Schmidt.
May 10th, 2009 at 2:07 pm
Wow. Makes me almost glad that I’ve never really figured out how to use Stumble Upon. I tend to ignore the people who send messages that say “please read my stuff”. Once in a while I do, but mostly the work isn’t that great, so I don’t add them to my friend list. The Triond tool bar is a big help to me because I can usually see freinds news daily, and read stuff as it comes out. I will add that Glynis and Pam both give great comments, so it’s only fair to make good comments back. By great, I mean honest and informative.
May 10th, 2009 at 2:15 pm
thanks all for your support.
May 10th, 2009 at 3:21 pm
Hear, hear Glynis.
Whenever I get a ‘fan’, I give him/her a thorough checking out before I make up my mind whether he/she is worthy to be elevated to status of friend.
You, me and lots of other writers have joined Triond to get our work put over, (if we can), to the general public in the big wide world, we haven’t joined to be part of a mutual admiration society!
I’d rather suffer no readers at all than to surrender to the ‘I’ll show you mine if you show me yours’ mentality of these Trionders.
My writing may be average or even below average but at least I’ve got integrity!
May 10th, 2009 at 4:01 pm
Wow — I didn’t realize that Stumble Upon was a community as well, with requests to read each other’s work. I have stumbled other’s works as well as my own, for a total of maybe only 5 or 6 articles total, but I haven’t done much of anything else — didn’t realize you could communicate and “make friends” or become a “fan”, etc.
Too complicated for me perhaps! I prefer just checking out the articles on Triond, reading my favorite authors and discovering new ones.
I don’t think I’ve done any of these mentioned acts, but they do sound bothersome, so my apologies if I ever have!
May 10th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
very well said Glynis…i fully agree…it’s everyone’s right to ACCEPT, REJECT,IGNORE and/or DELETE…Saludo!
May 10th, 2009 at 6:05 pm
I’m so glad you’ve resolved to take action that will make your experience at both Triond and SU a happier one!
May 10th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
Thanks for writing this, Glynis. I do have an SU account, but I don’t use it much. In fact, I only have one friend there, a Trionder too.
May 10th, 2009 at 9:57 pm
Some real truth here. Sorry, Glynis. I know it’s irritating. I have offended some friends and was quick to learn. I consider all my friends as “friends”. So I thought I was doing them a favor. We can never please everyone… I guess. Thank you for your honesty.
I guess, I’ll have to do some adjustments. I do hope you are still considering me as a friend
Thank you.
May 10th, 2009 at 10:46 pm
Hi Glynis! I haven’t been “trionding” on a regular basis lately….but I’ve seen a little of what you described in this article. Some folks just send links…not even introducing themselves or saying anything else…just a link to their article! I love reading articles on here…but like you I like to choose what I read from the newsfeed. Of course, the ones who have been my friends for a while and have nicely asked me to check out their latest, I don’t mind…they usually return the favor and read my latest. Well, I’ll stop babbling now! Well said…great message in this article!!!
May 10th, 2009 at 11:37 pm
A great article on a seriuos issue! Now I know why I havent pushed the issue of finding another site to write on beyong triond.I want to ,but doesnt need this hassle.Nor would I do what has been described in your article or even the comments.Thats silly to just send a link and nothing else-read Lisas comment-
May 11th, 2009 at 12:57 am
Thank you all. I have probably upset a few people by this…but I make no apologies as it is not my guilt to apologise for
I always look forward to adding fans as friends as George mentions, and am not an ogre LOL
I am noting who has made an effort to read my work lately, and those who have not bothered for a long time but are still active and expecting me to look at theirs, I have a few folk to jiggle about in the friends box.
Thanks again
May 11th, 2009 at 1:25 am
Good work Glynis. You have stated my feelings exactly! I have had some family issues to deal with the past few months and have not been around much, but boy, when I log on after a few days….I am whammied with a million requests to SU stuff. And its the same stuff with a new title, by the same so called writers. It gets old after a while.
Thanks to giving a voice to what many of us have been thinking.
May 11th, 2009 at 3:19 am
Like you Glynis, I am having a ’spring clean’ of my so-called friends. So if any of these people are reading this, don’t email me once you have disappeared out of my life!
May 11th, 2009 at 8:02 am
Hurrah!!! A voice that speaks up to say enough is enough. Sharing with each other is one thing. But only sharing to get a review or comment is something else. We support each other’s writings but it is as a favor not a requirement. Thank you for this article.
May 11th, 2009 at 1:22 pm
I totally agree Glynis, very good article, I think everything’s been said. I personally will comment/stumble if I like the work not just because I am asked to and recently received some abuse as someone had shared a poem of mine (I didn’t ask for this) and therefore expected me to share one in return. I will only share work I think is quality, be it photos, poems, articles … but do notice the same person’s articles often from two or three different sources and have recently removed a couple of friends on Triond and Stumble for that reason.
May 11th, 2009 at 6:16 pm
Glynis,
I want to apologize to you and all the rest of my triond friends. I have got caught up with the same messy share edicate or lack there of. Thank you Glynis for bringing this important message to our attention and I truely apologize to all. Your friendships are what is most important to me.
Bless you,
Chris
May 12th, 2009 at 1:11 am
Thank you all for your support and kind comments here and in my inbox.
Chris you could never abuse anyone if you tried, your heart is too big! I have no issue with you at all my friend. If you have gotten caught up with the ‘pushers’, get out quick, 5 were under investigation for self promotion on SU yesterday and all were in my friends list! They are no longer there, I wish to still be a member of a valuable community site.
May 13th, 2009 at 9:26 am
These insights are so true. None of us has the time to do all of what you’ve touched on above.
I would like to mention comments. Some people will leave a vague comment and you know they haven’t read your work–they have only added the smallest comment hoping you will read their work. This is also a time-waster.
I try to respond to genuine comments and am starting to ignore the same people who only comment to receive views to their articles.
May 13th, 2009 at 4:26 pm
Well said Glynis. I must admit when I first started submitting work with Triond I found loads of people becoming fans and, feeling guilty, I immediately reciprocated but I began to find that I was being inundated with misspelled, grammatically indecipherable rubbish that I was expected to read but the people whose work I really enjoyed were being overlooked and pushed to one side so I have to confess that I’ve taken several people off my friends list recently but have added new ones that I’ve since discovered who write intelligently and whose work really interests me. I may not get many ‘liked its’ or comments for my own articles and may not make a fortune from submitting it, but I’d rather have genuine friends who are interested in my work than hangers on hoping to gain monetarily from ‘leeching’ – and just because I’m a fan of someone’s I most certainly don’t expect them to be a fan of mine.
May 13th, 2009 at 6:59 pm
I love Glynis! I missed you. I have to say, I could not agree with you more. I am getting flooded with 100 stumbles a day, 75 of those being from Triond. I am in no way intending on getting kicked out of SU so I stopped commenting and thumbing up these pieces. I am sure that these Trionders are starting to see a decline in their page views.
In fact, one of those trionders told me their views are not so good so thumb it up please. I mean, Come On!
May 14th, 2009 at 4:17 am
I agree with the views expressed here. Honesty and commitment are called for in every relationship, online or off.
May 14th, 2009 at 4:28 am
Thanks to all.
I have missed you too Lauren and am glad because it means you are studying LOL!!
I thank all of those who have contacted me privately too.
May 16th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
Very true……….like it or not…….we are now famous in our own way and as such, I have found the celebrity status hard to deal with sometimes……..bravo!! Well done!!
May 19th, 2009 at 5:41 pm
Dear Glynis, Do not allow yourself to be taken advantage of. Anyone that hounds you is not a friend. Delete them pronto.
May 20th, 2009 at 2:00 am
Yes my days of being polite and nice to all is over, only those who show respect and not greed will get my attention. Thank you all for your support.
May 29th, 2009 at 8:48 am
It’s sad that things have come to this. I have not written or commented much on Triond lately. If I post something I do not expect my fans/friends to come and read it as soon as I post it. I think that everyone should try to be polite. And to be honest, some people were publishing way too many items in one day and I really did not want to spend my time reading 5 or 6 poems by the same person. I know, it may sound rude, but time is really precious. That’s one of the other reasons why I haven’t been around here much.
June 5th, 2009 at 4:31 pm
This is all very true to the article.
June 22nd, 2009 at 9:47 am
Glynis, it has been awhile since I’ve been on Triond but as usual you are absolutely correct. I actually removed the ability to e-mail me from StumbleUpon for this very reason. As I have time, I will Stumble what I find I enjoy here on Triond. I don’t need or want it shoved in my face. Thank you for speaking your mind on this. People need to hear it.
August 5th, 2009 at 4:35 am
you are so right on the triond friends.
August 10th, 2009 at 2:23 am
I actually disengaged my stumbleupon toolbar a few months ago because of this reason Glynis. I was sick of having so many damn pages sent to me. Most didn’t interest me at all. So I stopped using stumbleupon at all for a while. I think I ended up annoying a few people because I wasn’t stumbling anything. I think you have got it exactly right here and I know my true triond friends understand my lack of stumbling and even commenting lately.
RJ
November 24th, 2009 at 11:33 am
great ideas. Good thoughts.
November 25th, 2009 at 10:46 pm
Thank you for the helpful hints. I have often wondered if it would be worth it to go with SU or Digg; however, I find that I have quite enough with Triond, my blog, and my social networks. One of my goals on Triond is to may friends – not irritate them to the point of jumping off the deep end.
Thank you for interesting and informative articles.
November 27th, 2009 at 12:17 pm
u r right any kind of forced must do is wrong.good article pls keep writing.